9/11 Made Me a Mom

It’s been 10 years since the 9/11 terrorist attacks changed life as we know it in the US. I wasn’t there. I didn’t know anyone who died. I didn’t even know anyone who lost someone in those terrible attacks. But I can tell you exactly where I was and how it changed me. 9/11 made me a mom.

That morning, I was sitting in the vet’s office getting a check up for one of our four dogs. I was sitting in the waiting room watching the Today Show when they broke in with news of the first crash. I was saddened by the thought of the lives lost on the plane and in the building.

Still waiting, I was shocked to watch the second crash at the World Trade Center and then the Pentagon. Immediately, I called David, crying more than talking, telling him about the terrible events of the morning. I was scared and needed his reassurance that the world we knew wasn’t going crazy.

I remember that all of the doctors and staff at the clinic sat with us to watch the coverage. There was an eerie silence that even the pets in the room didn’t disturb.

I left without getting the check up, dropped the dog at home and went to David. I had to be with him. I went with a group from our office to an impromptu prayer service instead of going to lunch. I donated blood. And I cried almost all day.

As the details of the tragedy unfolded, it was staggering to think that there were people in the world filled with that much rage and hatred. Like so many, I needed to reevaluate my life. I knew that everything had changed around me. I could either spend my life afraid of what might be, or I could take control. If you know me, you know I am not a wait and see kind of girl.

Out of all that reflection came a decision. I never really had a desire to become a mother. I was happy with the life that David and I had built. But the events of that day forced me to face what was really my fear of motherhood.

I realized that life really is too short, and I wanted David and I to have that experience and to bring new life into what was probably going to remain a crazy world. To share the love that we had with someone we had created.

Just a little over a year later, Makenna was born. And four years after that came the twins. And life as we knew it has, once again, been flipped on its head!

On this day of remembrance, I say thank you to the men and women who became heroes that day. And I grieve for the many who lost their lives. And I will share the story with my children and hold them even tighter and thank God that I have them in my life.


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